I felt really OK about my appointment at Columbia yesteday. The doctors were thorough and detailed and obviously experienced & educated in this particular disorder in a way that (it seems) the regular high risk doctors are not. I felt like they really held our hand through the process and did whatever was needed to make us feel comfortable.
Our prognosis at this point seemed pretty good, considering. Like the other doctor, they determined that everything seemed balanced and within range. Their main issue was the fluid imbalance, which was a little above 8 for baby B- Daisy, and about 3.8 for baby A, Sunshine. Technically, those levels are not even extremem enough for a Stage 1 diagnosis. He Does think it has all the warning signs and will progress, but we’re all hoping he’s wrong. They’ll continue to monitor weekly.
Thanks to everyone who has read this- friends and strangers… although I am now using this blog as a sort of diary and sounding board, I can see the visitors and appreciate every one of you for your support.
My Gorgeous Cervix
It’s true. I do. That’s what the ultrasound technician told us anyway. See, at columbia, they test everything. They did an internal exam to determine the length of my cervix, since that is an indicator of your likelihood of early labor in TTTS. this was something that had me worried. Especially since The Kid was 3.5 weeks early, If the cervix is shorter than 2.5cm, they do this procedure where they kinda sew it closed to prevent early labor. Well, my cervix is measuring 4.9cm. and that is officially “gorgeous”. That’s not to say it can’t shrink under the weight of two happy bouncy healthy babies, but at least it’s starting at a nice place.
Daisy & Sunshine
My friend came over last night and I had not yet told her about any of the drama that we’ve been dealing with. She got a new car and I was asking about it’s size, and whether 2 car seats and a booster would fit in the back seat. She said “I imagine they would, so The Kid could be in the middle flanked by her two sisters, Daisy & Sunshine!”
I was like “That’s it!!” the TTTS boards suggest naming the babies so it feels more “personal” and even the drs. mentioned that the A & B can get confusing. So, from her on out, Baby A -The doner, who is smaller, weaker and takes up less space- is going to be Sunshine- big & strong, and Baby B, the recipient- who is bigger, will be Daisy- strong and vibrant but delicate. So, really the “opposite” of their status which might, in fact, get more confusing…. but I don’t care. I find it inspiring.
Will follow up more later on my appointments yesterday at Columbia. Overall, decent news…
Thank God- double checked my insurance and I am covered. I have an appointment tomorrow, and I am actually almost looking forward to it. I just feel like at least with these people I am being proactive.
Will follow up and let you know how it goes…
I was telling a friend about the technician and the nurse and she told me her horror story… which made me feel a little better for myself… worse for her…
At a routine ultrasound (maybe the first or second) for her first pregnancy, she’s lying on the table and the tech is doing her thing. Then the tech turned to her and says “You know, your baby has no heartbeat”
That’s how she learned she had lost the baby.
Do you have a story about a hellish ultrasound tech or nurse? They really should be muzzled.
The Nurse from Hell... Though she sounded older
I spent yesterday at my in-laws and seeing some friends and I cant get that phone call with the devil nurse out of my mind. While I am no longer a bawling mess, I’ve gotten really angry and can’t believe that woman had the Chutzpah to talk to me like that! I mean, it would have been one thing if she had said “We need to see you quickly or both your babies will die” – not that THAT would have been acceptable, but at least it indicates an intention to help me! Saying what she did- there is just no excuse. The reason the doctor was so highly recommended was because he is (supposedly) not only smart and knowledgable, but compassionate and reassuring when a patient is dealing with all the scary stuff associated with high-risk pregnancies. That damn nurse said to me she was the doctors nurse, he was out of town and she was telling me what he would tell me if I spoke to him. Somehow, I don’t believe her. I’m gonna write to her boss.She simply should not be able to talk to people like that without ANY consequences. While I can’t do anything to guarantee anything will come of my complaint- I am entitled to write one. I hope that bitch gets fired- or at least FEELS BAD!
So, I’ve been stressed about the possibility of twin twin transfusion syndrome since I first learned about the twins and what TTTS is. So, 16 weeks is really the earliest they could look and see signs of that if it’s happening, so I’m really anxious about the appointment tomorrow- though I’m sure everything will be fine.
After 16 weeks, they’ll be giving me ultrasounds every other week to monitor their growth and amniotic sacks and heartbeats. They better not charge me copays at every visit!!!
I watched an episode of 16 and Pregnant on MTV last night where the kids decide to give their baby up for adoption because they want the kid to have a better life than they had. Their parents (who are married to each other- weird) are both against adoption and think these 16 year olds should raise the kid with poverty and lack of education- “if this house was good enough for you, it should be good enough for your kid” the father says and the kid, wise beyond his years, tells his dad that HIS kid deserves more.
I cried for that whole hour. Don’t know why it hit me at such a level, and adoption stories always make me cry, and being preggo makes me cry constantly at the drop of a hat, but something about this couple and the way they cared about each other and their unborn baby really broke my heart. This morning on the bus on the way to work I thought about it again and cried on the bus. I’m even tearing up now. Man, hormones are nuts.
So, I’m having a hard time figuring out how these link things work, but in the meanwhile, I wanted to write about some stuff that’s been on my mind.
It’s getting difficult to carry The Kid. She’s 15 months and really hitting a time where she is demanding a lot of attention. It’s hard because I really should not be carrying her- I can feel her weight sitting on my belly and I know that’s not good. Today, some relatives arrived from out of town and while they were here and talking to the hubbo she was getting all crazy because she really really wanted me to hold her. I felt so bad that I took her, and I felt the strain on my body. I’m not among the strongest people you’ll ever meet and I’m just worried because the farther along I get, and the heavier she gets, the harder it’s gonna get to handle. As if I needed more stuff to stress about.